Don't even think for a minute that I've been obsessing over you and stalking you via Myspace or whatever. If your self-importance is that puffed up, then you're an even bigger jackass than I thought.
I've definitely moved on and done so many new things in my life to be proud of, and met lots of amazing new people who are now friends. So you were just a friend, not even a good one, and the idea that I even think about you when I've got so much else on my plate is laughable.
You're the pathetic one. You're the one making jam for a living and the only way you can ever get a girlfriend is picking on poor vulnerable women online. I was tempted to tell your current girlfriend about your pathetic self-pitying tactics to get women but I thought you two looked happy, so I thought I should leave all alone and continue moving on with my life and ignore whatever I found out about you being a bastard.
You know what? You are a fucking pathetic bastard. That's the reason your wife and all your other stupid girlfriends left you. Because your main act to get women is to appear all "woe is me" and act as though women have always screwed you over. Guess what, buddy? The problem is YOU. You're a fucktard. And I genuinely feel sorry for you because any woman stupid enough to be with you actually has to support your ridiculous jam-making endeavours and all the time you waste playing fantasy football.
Now that I think about it, you really deserve a huge amount of pity. And scorn. Seriously, good luck wading through life with such a ridiculous bag of tricks. I just pity your poor new girlfriend who's probably going to end up supporting you. That's how worthless you are.
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